And lie? I said never.

Lies are funny things, I think. So often we shun lies, but what if our lives are lies? I feel like mine is to a certain extent. I lie to people a lot. I tell them I'm fine when I'm not. I tell them I'm not cutting when I am. I tell them nothing is wrong when my world is falling apart. I say I'm tired when I'm really just sad. I tell people I'm not going to die, when secretly, I've been thinking about it for days. So in short, I lie. A lot.

If I was to justify my lies, I would say that I'm trying to protect myself. And not just myself, but others too. Because sometimes I think there are some things people just shouldn't know. And I know I'm right because people think I'm weird and that other people shouldn't be involved in me.

I laughed, a lot, when I was told this. And I know where it came from too. But if I'm to be honest, sitting here thinking about it, yeah it hurts a bit. In fact it hurts a bit more every time I reflect upon it. For all my apparent weirdness, I am still a human. I still have feelings. I too, want to have friends and be happy and feel like I belong. Who are these people to influence others on issues they don't understand? They must be perfect, unlike me, of course. And this is why I will continue to lie. I will continue to lie because people don't understand and they judge. So my continued tendency to lie comes from my constant need for self preservation. And the reality of the situation is, that if I'm not protecting myself then who is?

So I lie to protect myself. And in my mind I can justify this and its okay, to me. You may feel differently, but that's how I feel. So then what of people who lie to seek attention? Well, I just can't stand them. You have no right to lie. There is no reason for it. You are out to hurt people and that is not okay.

And that is the essential difference between the two. I lie to protect myself. The only person who will be hurt is me. However, the group who do the aforementioned are lying maliciously.

Lies are dangerous things. They spread like wildfire.

But who is to say the truth is any better in some cases? It too can spread like wildfire if people think its good gossip. And then its distorted into lies and people treat you like you belong in a mental asylum. And maybe I do, but that is not for you to decide when you've only heard lies. The truth has proven, on several occasions, to be just as hurtful as lies. So I don't know what to do with that. If both are equally as bad as each other, then what do you say?

I don't have the answers, so I'll not pretend that I do. But I think that my lies are the best protection I have, and as such I think I'll continue. Especially given the quality of character I encounter on a daily basis.

- Sky